Mother cuts off contact with her children after moving in with new husband, 23-year-old daughter is left alone with young siblings: 'She picked a man over her children'

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Dec 16, 2024 9:00 AM EST

When talking to new parents, one of the biggest changes they would mention about becoming a parent is how they are no longer only living for their own sake. Having a kid means that your existence and purpose in life do not revolve around you anymore, but it revolves around this completely separate human being. This creates a firm distinction between good and bad parents – Good parents see this change as beautiful and meaningful, and bad parents teach themselves to resent their kids for it. 

It seems like the mom in this Reddit story has learned to resent her kids, and she has reached a breaking point that caused the entire family to collapse. OP (original poster) is her 23-year-old daughter who moved to her mother's house in order to help her take care of her younger siblings. This only caused OP's mom to fully move out of her home and go live with her new husband. Now OP has been left alone to take care of her siblings, and no matter what she tells her mother, she refuses to come back to her children…

Keep scrolling to read the full story. After you are done, click here to read a story of a student who refused a classmate's prom invitation, which got her in trouble with his mom.

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  • 01
    "She's now no longer talking to me"
    via chameleonseye

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA For telling my mom she'll regret picking her husband over her children
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 03
    I (23F) and my husband (22M) moved in with my mom over the summer to help my mom with her bills and to help take care of my three younger siblings. The main reason for this move was
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 04
    because I did not want her to get back with her "boyfriend" that she had been dating on and off for the past 7-8 years. Not long after we moved in she starts talking to him again after
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 05
    repeatedly telling me she was never going to get back together with him. She then goes on to marry him and since then has taken on this mentality that she is his wife and has responsibilities
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 06
    towards him so she has to be with him 24/7. Which in turn meant to me and my siblings that we would see her less because he does not live with us. Ever since she got married she goes directly to him after work and the only
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 07
    time my siblings see her is in the mornings when she takes them to school, she's not even home during the weekends. Recently this past weekend me and her ended up arguing over text because my siblings miss
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 08
    their mom and wanted to see her. She then chooses to instead of coming to see her kids to call them and tell them that she is too busy to see them and that when she was there that all they did was play video games but now
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 09
    that she's with her husband they suddenly "miss her" and want to "spend time with her." This made my siblings sad which naturally made me step in and tell her off. I told her she can't be serious right now and that obviously her
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 10
    children are going to miss her. That even though they might have a roof over their heads and food that doesn't mean they don't still need their mother's presence more than just a few minutes in the morning when
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 11
    they're going to school. I told her she can't seriously be picking a man that has literally shown he does not care about her over her children who do love her.
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 12
    She responded by telling me the same thing she told my siblings that when she was with us that my siblings didn't appreciate her and that they just spend their time playing games. I'm like be so for real you're resenting them as
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 13
    if they're not literally children where's that energy with that man that has literally done nothing good for us. She's like oh so I'm a bad mom, okay that's fine you'll regret your words one day. She then hangs up on me and refuses my calls and texts my
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 14
    sister telling her she's not going to talk to me. So I texted her and told her the one that's going to regret her words is you and you'll be sorry for picking a man over your children. The day you learn to not put a man on a pedestal is the day you'll get your blessings.
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 15
    It's a serious mental problem to be so attached to a man. That I love her but I know she's not okay by doing what she's doing. She's now no longer talking to me and only contacts my siblings.
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 16
    AITA or was this a reality check my mom needed? Edit: Since I didn't include their ages in the original post my siblings are 10M, 13M, and 15F. Incase you're wondering my mom's age she's 40 and her new
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 17
    husband is about 50/60, I'm not entirely sure his exact age. Their dad is 38. For those wondering where their dad is, he is still in the picture but he also has a new partner. He comes to visit them once or twice a week sometimes and buys them food and clothes.
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 18
    He is supposed to be giving my mom child support but he's not always very timely about it. I also want to acknowledge my mom does contribute financially to them still, the only issue is she is not here physically with them as often as she should be.
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 19
    Themarchsisters1 • 23h ago NTA. I'd say that her husband made it clear that he didn't want her kids living with them, so she got you to move in so she could move out. She's at least going to have to pay you child support if you choose to bring up your
    via Themarchsisters1
  • 20
    siblings in the long term. As you and your husband are so young is he ok suddenly being dad to 3 kids? If he's not, I'd be asking your mums sister or other family members to step in and either convince your mum that child abanonment is illegal, or take the kids themselves if they can.
    via Themarchsisters1
  • 21
    Brilliant-Aside3626 OP 22h ago My husband fortunately does not mind since he hasn't really taken the role of "dad" he is more of an older brother to them. His only issue is the obvious stress and disappointment my mom's absence has caused.
    via Brilliant-Aside3626
  • 22
    Little-starr- •23h ago • Part ipant [1] NTA and honestly, your mom needed to hear that. It sounds like you're stepping up in a situation where your mom is neglecting her responsibilities, and that's not fair to you or your siblings.
    via Little-starr-
  • 23
    Her excuse about your siblings "not appreciating her" because they play video games is honestly ridiculous. Kids play games—that doesn't mean they don't love or miss their mom. They're children, and it's her job as
    via Little-starr-
  • 24
    their parent to be present, even if they aren't showering her with gratitude 24/7. It feels like she's using that as an excuse to justify prioritizing her husband over her kids.
    via Little-starr-
  • 25
    GothPenguin ⚫1d ago Judge, Jury, an... Top 1% Comme... NTA-If she wants to spend all of her time and energy with her husband she needs to wait until she no longer has children who need her at home and as an actual physical presence in their lives. She's acting like an immature, selfish child when she needs to be a mom.
    via GothPenguin
  • 26
    edebby • 1d ago P❤perintenda... NTA. Top 1% Comme... She's a horrible parent. Making up such stupid excuses to whether her kids care or not about her means she has a guilty conscious, and she knows perfectly good that her decision is very bad.
    via edebby
  • 27
    Imchatterbox • 23h ago P❤perintendant [53] NTA. Those kids should come first whether they play video games or not.
    via Imchatterbox
  • 28
    Winter-Road2976 • 23h ago • This is EXACTLY what my mum has done picked a bloke over me and my sister and her granddaughters but kept my brother and her grandson around
    via Winter-Road2976

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family drama aita drama kids mother siblings bad parenting reddit story parenting petty husband entitled family daughter Reddit children
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